Late Night Kebab Runs

I just realised how much I am going to freaking miss being here after this semester is over. I kind of had a brief stint of home-sickness in the middle of class today but then I just wrote a postcard to my friend Kelsey and I was mostly better. Now I'm realising how much it's going to suck to be back home. I'm sitting on the foot of Alex's bed in their apartment and we are all three on our computers. 12 minutes ago I don't even know what we were talking about. Kim was sitting on Michelle's bed and we were having some sort of conversation. I was looking up recipes on Jamie Oliver's website because I do weird things like that sometimes (seriously though, his website is awesome. You should check it out sometime). It was then that I realised that I hadn't really had much to eat today. I voiced that looking at his website wasn't helping the hunger factor and Alex said that she wished the diner down the street was open so that we could get burgers and I looked at her and said, "the kebab place is still open for another 9 minutes". She looked at me with that wide eyed excited look that she has sometimes, shut her laptop and said, "let's get one!". We then proceeded to stuff money in our pockets, throw the nearest pair of shoes on and run out the door and into the stairwell of our apartment building (making it a literal kebab run). Kim was a bit inebriated from having drank almost an entire bottle of wine all by herself so that was entertaining.

We saw the cute kebab man and he smiled when he saw us and gave the kebabs to us for 1 euro off since he was almost out of ingredients and since it was the end of the night. Kim said something about missing us and that made me realise how much I am going to miss these people. Anna Lee, Kristen, Michelle, Alex, and Kim. We've all shared in this experience and it's going to suck being apart. We've already started making plans to roadtrip the country together to see each other. The only problem is that I don't really know if it's going to happen. It's the same with my high school friends. You always say you are going to keep in touch and see each other over the breaks and visit each other at school and it just doesn't happen. Sometimes you can tell if it's just words. It's easy to just throw the comment away when you know that. But sometimes it's someone you really care about and they don't make an effort at all. That's when it sucks. To realise that you still fully intend on keeping in touch and make the effort only to not have the effort returned. I hope it happens. These people are seriously awesome. We are all going to feel the same thing when we get back home too. Going to miss each other like crazy and going to hate the feeling of no one really caring about our trip and experiences when we get back.

I'm starting to sound like an angsty high schooler, I know. I don't mean to. I just realised though that it's sort of like we are in high school. The classes aren't that hard. We're all together pretty much all the time just like high school. Personally the transition from high school to college sucked and I was kind of depressed for a while. I loved my high school friends and I didn't have that many friends in college. Pretty much the only person I knew was Sarah. Thank god for her. I don't know what I would have done to be honest. It was really difficult going from the ease of having your friends around you all day every day to having them spread out around the state and sometimes thrown in other states. It sucked not seeing them every day like I used to. Sometimes I wonder if it's worth it putting myself through these things just to have them end. I know it is. This is an awesome, once in a lifetime opportunity. I just wish it could keep going. I have a month and a week left. That's it. I wish I could tote these people around with me every where I go but I can't. I'm unfortunately going to have to leave them behind. Let them move on with their lives like I'll have to move on with my life.

I'm kind of bad at moving on. Like the London trip that I haven't really posted about yet. The last full day in London with Danielle was kind of brought down by my own sadness that it was the last day I got to spend in my favourite place in the world with my favourite person in the world. She told me not to think about it but it didn't really work. I was still sad that I had to leave though and that the experience had to end. I just wish that I could press pause and that I could keep living in the moment. No pause button though, unfortunately. I have to keep getting older and moments have to keep ending until I eventually end. Wow that was depressing. And sadly true.

I can't really think of anything funny to add to this. I'm really sorry about that. This whole post is just going to have to be sad and dead depressing. You don't have to comment or even read it if you don't want. Don't really blame you.

OK, here's something funny. Kim is singing slash dancing to this song right here. Too much drank for Kim. Good times.